


No More Excuses

by Galaxa13



Series: You're Special [1]
Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-17
Updated: 2019-07-17
Packaged: 2020-06-29 23:49:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,451
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19841089
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Galaxa13/pseuds/Galaxa13
Summary: The couple have a much needed conversation about trust and consent. Zen needs to stop holding out on his girlfriend.





	No More Excuses

Zen sighed as he sank into the couch, his arms draped over the back. Closing his eyes he allowed himself the luxury of just doing nothing for a moment. Then he felt a presence above him.

"You tired?" an amused voice asked. He opened his eyes and saw his wonderful girlfriend smiling down at him.

"Not really, just enjoying being home after a long day of rehearsals. Thanks again for meeting me at the studio." he said.

"No problem. I liked being able to keep you company on your way home." she said before placing her hands on his shoulders and leaning down to press a kiss against his forehead. "Just as long as you don't forget I'm still here."

"I could never forget you're around." he said as he smiled up at her. 

She smiled back, still hovering just above him. Strands of her hair began to unfurl from over her shoulder, making a curtain around him so that the rest of the world was blocked out. He felt a warmth in his chest as he stared up at her face. He loved her so much.

Then, ever so slowly, her hands began to slide down his chest. Her smile had faded away and her eyes were _hungry_. 

"Babe?" he asked, feigning confusion as his panic spiked.

"It's a good thing you're not tired." she said in a low voice. Her fingers began working at the buttons of his shirt. 

In a flash he caught her wrists in his hands and held them out in front of his chest.

"Hey now, none of that!" he laughed, trying to ignore the pounding of his heart. Had she been able to feel it? "You should be more careful. You don't want to unleash the beast, do you?"

She had frozen as soon as he grabbed her wrists and she stared at him with shocked confusion. Then she stood up straight, pulling her hands free of his. Silently she walked around the couch and he watched her journey. Crossing in front of him she settled down on his other side, neatly tucking one leg under herself as she sat down so that she was facing him.

"Zen," she said blankly, "if you don't want to have sex with me you can just say so."

He spluttered as he turned his torso toward her. Did she think he wasn't interested in her? That couldn't be farther from the truth!

"Babe, no! You're gorgeous! Of course I want to have sex with you!" he started to explain, but she held up a hand and shook her head.

"Stop. Just stop right there," she said. "I'm asking if _you_ are uncomfortable, not if you're attracted to me."

He opened his mouth, but then promptly closed it again. His mind was buzzing. What did she mean? How was he supposed to answer her?

Her expression turned to worry and she leaned closer, putting a hand on his arm.

"You're always talking about that "beast" inside you. No matter how many times I proposition you you turn me away, saying you don't want to hurt me. Zen, I _want_ this. I don't know how much more clear I can be. I want you to touch me all over, I want you to kiss me fiercly, I want you to make love to me.

"But if _you_ aren't comfortable taking that step yet that's _fine_. Just please stop using protecting me as an excuse. I want this, but I'm not going to force you into anything."

His heart clenched as he listened to her.

"No, no, no!" he said, grabbing both her arms desperately. "I want this too! I really do! It's just..." His voice faltered as he looked down. How could he possibly explain how much he desired her without sounding like a creep? How could he explain his holding back without it sounding like more excuses to her?

"I'm no stranger to fooling around," he said softly, still not looking up, "but you're too special for that. I want to do right by you. You're my princess. I don't know what I'd do if I messed this up." 

His hands slid down her arms as he brought his head back up. He gently squeezed her fingers as he stared into her eyes, trying to convey all his love for her. She had to know, he couldn't ever let her mistake his feelings for her.

"I know what I'm like in bed," he continued. "I get rough. It was usually fine because they weren't serious relationships. They didn't last long enough for it to matter. Not you, though, I want you with me for longer. I want you so bad it drives me crazy, but I'm scared of what I'll do to you if I let myself give in."

_I might break you._

"You give yourself far too little credit." she said, smiling at him. Then she shuffled over until she was nestled in his lap, arms draped around his neck.

He made the concentrated effort not to move his arms and touch her. God, why did she have to do this? He _just_ told her why this was a bad idea! It took everything in him not to just wrap his arms around her and flip her under him on this couch.

"I trust you, Hyun," she said softly as she nuzzled against him. "If the beast hurts the princess then she'll call out for help and her knight in shining armor will come to her rescue."

He didn't know what to say. Her voice was full of so much warmth and affection. Hesitantly he wrapped his arms around her and held her close, breathing in her scent.

"I'm not a porcelain doll," she continued as they embraced. "I don't mind getting a little rough. I know you'll stop if I tell you to."

Will he? He wasn't as sure as she was. That's what scared him.

Sensing his unease she pulled back and looked him dead in the eye.

"Talk to me. We can't work through this if you don't communicate with me. Ideally I'd like to be having sex with you at _some_ point in our relationship."

"Sorry, sorry," he said with a sigh. "You're right. I _should_ be talking with you. I just... wish I could trust myself as much as you do."

She was silent for a moment. She appeared to be thinking hard. He couldn't help the smirk tugging at his lips as he watched her. She was so cute. He almost got like lost in his adoration of her when she spoke up again.

"You said it had been five years since your last relationship, right?"

"Yeah, why?" He couldn't imagine why she felt the need to bring up his dry spell.

"So you would have been 19 the last time you had been with anyone."

"What's your point?" he asked, raising a brow.

"All your sex experience is from when you were a dumb kid! You've matured a lot since then! Do you plan to go celibate the rest of your life because of what you did as a _teenager_?" she said, throwing a hand in the air.

"Oh." he said, blinking in realization. "I... hadn't thought about it like that..." Suddenly he started laughing. He bent over, burying his face in her shoulder as his whole body shook.

"I'm... really stupid, aren't I?" he said as he continued to laugh.

"Mmm, maybe just a little." she teased as she stroked his hair.

He lifted his head and planted a kiss right on her lips. She hummed in response and kissed him back. He didn't want to stop kissing her. His beautiful princess, how was she so wonderful? He squeezed her tight as he began to trail kisses along her jaw.

"So will we be going to the next step, or just enjoying a makeout session?" she asked as he showered her in affection. "Because I'd like to know whether or not I should be getting my hopes up."

That... was an important question. He pulled away from her, looking at her face and contemplating. She was silent and patient, but he could see a faint glimmer of hope in her eyes. He wanted to tell her they were going to have sex. _God_ he wanted to, but not here. Not right now. Things needed to be ready. She deserved something special, something romantic. Screwing on his couch after work wasn't good enough.

"Just a makeout right now," he said, "but I promise sometime soon to make love to you. I won't keep you waiting forever, princess."

"Whenever you're ready." she replied before pulling him back in for more kisses.


End file.
